A couple days ago, I was in the car with my dad as he drove me to the dentist. On our way there, he turned on the radio (Chinese channel) and we happened to come across an interesting topic.
The scenario was: A woman has been dating her boyfriend for around 10 years. However, she kept rejecting his proposal for marriage because she felt like the guy couldn’t support her. Her man decided that he was only going to ask once more. If she’s going to reject him again, then they will break up. However, the woman was furious because she has spent 10 years of her youth with this man. She thinks she’s doing nothing wrong because she wants to motivate him to earn more money. In her opinion, what’s the point of getting married if they cannot afford to start a family together? Therefore, she has called into the radio station to complain.
When I first heard this, I was amused and slightly shocked. The woman should have stated her expectations from the start. The man could have then chose to either stay with her and satisfy her, or break up with her so she could go find someone else.
But then I thought about it, is that even love? It seemed more like a contract to me. It’s like, “Oh, I’ll marry or be with you if you make X amount and you can give me X and do X and etc.”
It sounds like a conditional offer. -_-
On the other hand, there has to be some sort of expectations, no? If we have no expectations, then anyone can be our partner. We definitely have to narrow down our searches.
Shortly after, my friend Alex shared a video with me on facebook.
It was an interesting video and it made me question a few things. Is it reasonable for us to expect so much from our significant other?? We want someone who not only is our best friend, but also a lover; someone who will never lose their enthusiasm to raise children with us; someone who will not be attracted to anyone else; someone who will accept all our flaws and weaknesses…and so on.
It honestly doesn’t seem realistic.
In my opinion, having so many expectations will only lead to dissatisfaction. Instead of appreciating what your significant other is doing/has done for you, you will be expecting them to do it.
When you expect it, you will not appreciate it because “that’s how it’s supposed to be”.
I think couples who show their appreciation for each other are the ones that last a lifetime.
What are your thoughts?
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P.S. If you’re here for the translations, I am working on Chapter 16. It will be up tomorrow!