Avoid these 3 online dating mistakes + 2 great tips

To my dear readers,

I haven’t blogged in SO LONG. Haha. (Sorry). Today, I would like to share some of the online dating mistakes I have made in the past and also two awesome tips. Hopefully, this post will help provide you with some insight.

 

  1. Too focused on the outcome

This is a big one. In the past, while I was online dating, my sole purpose was to find a potential relationship. I didn’t want to sleep around, or waste time. So, my mindset was, “Don’t talk to me unless you want something serious.”

However, whoever you’re talking to doesn’t even know you yet. You can’t expect or ask someone to show commitment before they even have an idea of what you’re like.

Suggestion: After speaking to them for a week or two, perhaps set up a date to meet up and see whether you enjoy their company. Don’t make it like an interview style and ask questions like, “When would you like to settle down?” “How many kids do you want?” and etc (Note: I didn’t do that but you get the idea. It may scare off a lot of people if you come off so intense at the beginning. Do not plan out or imagine your entire future with a stranger!)

 

  1. Suffered from Oneitis

In the past, I recalled getting very attached to someone I’ve met online. I think it was because I liked him so much that I didn’t want to talk to anyone else. I was so focused on him that I wanted him to respond to me every day (and quickly too). I didn’t realize I was giving him so much pressure until it was much too late.

I remember having lots of options but in my mind, I was like, “No! I just want him! I don’t need anyone else!” (I know, so pathetic -_-). But when you’re overly obsessed with a person, it makes you appear very clingy and desperate.

Suggestion: Pace yourself in the conversation. It’s not sustainable if you want someone to constantly respond to you. Quality over quantity. Also, don’t focus on just one guy/girl until you guys are exclusive. He/she is probably talking to many others as well.

 

  1. Being too demanding

In the past, I’ve been extremely vocal about what I want. But if a person is interested in you, you wouldn’t need to force him/her to do anything.

As my student/friend said, “Grace, don’t judge a man by what he says. Judge a man by what he does.”

It’s sooooo true! Let his actions to speak for himself.

If a person wants to see you, they’ll make time. If a person values you, they’ll show you. Allow them to come to you.

Suggestion: Don’t make anyone do anything. Just let it be and wait and see.

Now that I’ve told you about the 3 mistakes I’ve made, here are 2 awesome tips: Continue reading “Avoid these 3 online dating mistakes + 2 great tips”

Advertisements

Friendship

Friendship

When we were little, a friend could simply be someone who played with us. Perhaps it was someone who liked what we liked. There weren’t really any requirements.

But as we get older, our definition of a friend starts changing. People who we hang out with are not necessarily our friends anymore. Our standards become higher and people have to start earning our friendships.

Everyone’s idea of a friend could vary. However, I believe that the qualities of a true friend is pretty much standard for all of us.

Continue reading “Friendship”

The Three Ways

Three

Note: You might want to read my previous post before reading this one.

In my opinion, there are 3 ways you can develop a fan base/support group.

1.      They see the value

When people see the value in something, they are willing to invest. To them, it is worth it. That is the reason why some people get cosmetic surgeries, buy LV, spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on a Ferrari, purchase a home, or line up overnight to see Robert Pattinson as a sparkling vampire.

However, initially, it is very difficult to get someone to see the value in something they have never experienced or seen before. Most often, it takes a lot of exposure, time, and capital. Some might say it also takes a certain amount of luck. Sometimes, timing can make all the difference.

But once you can get people to see the value in you/your business/idea/services, you are set! It is very unlikely that people will “un-see” the value in something once they believe it.

So, can you create or provide something for people to value?

Continue reading “The Three Ways”