Tag: insight

Beware of Online Love + Crypto Scam. Personal experience included!

I was going to write this post several months ago, but I got lazy. But this issue happens too often, so I believe that it’s important for me to write a post about it to warn you all.

Nowadays, the younger generation spends most of their time online and on the phone. It isn’t uncommon for people to have various apps to stay in touch with friends, family, and even to meet strangers/potential love interests.

However, because you may be exposing yourself to the “world”, you really need to be careful. Sometimes, you’re not even actively searching, but they will find you.

For example, I received a random text from this dude who messaged me on Whatsapp a few months ago.

Translation:

Guy: Hi, Gwen. Nice to meet you. Auntie Wang gave me your phone number.

Me: Hi. My name is Grace. Who is Auntie Wang?

Guy: Auntie Wang said she already told you about me. Aren’t you Gwen? I have already messed up once. *angry face*

Me: You found the wrong person. I don’t know any Auntie Wang.

Guy: Forget it. I won’t keep searching. I’ll tell Auntie Wang I’ve found you. Nice to meet you, Grace. My name is Louis. Oh wait, you know Chinese?

This guy is clearly a scammer. First of all, I don’t know any Auntie Wang. And let’s say this “Auntie Wang” did exist, why the heck would she introduce me to someone that doesn’t even LIVE in Toronto? The phone number was from the U.S. And this person sounded surprised I know Chinese. Does he think I’m stupid? He is getting “introduced” to someone without knowing that person actually knows Chinese, but he messages me in Chinese?

Omg. I got so mad that I blocked him after a few more back and forth. I wanted to know how he would try to scam me, but it’s not worth my time.

And it’s also quite obvious he stole the picture of a random handsome “western” looking guy and is pretending to be him. I don’t know how he got my phone number, but I know of a few people who’ve also received messages from random strangers on Wechat and Whatsapp. My guy friend got a message from someone who claims she’s from Hong Kong. He told her she got the wrong person, but she kept talking and started talking about investing and etc. BEWARE. Continue reading “Beware of Online Love + Crypto Scam. Personal experience included!”

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My dating experience on Hinge

Disclaimer: This is from my own personal experience and may or may not reflect the experiences of others. I started using Hinge from August 30th until around mid Oct of 2019.

PROFILE

You can sign up an account using only your phone number. Hinge allows you to choose/upload 6 photos of yourself. It took me a while to choose 6 haha. My friends next to me were so impatient.

  • I picked a selfie with my friend (but I covered her face in case it was confusing).
  • I had another full body image of myself so people would have an idea of my physical size (This was the most popular photo. I got the most hearts from this one).
  • There was a photo of me sitting with a bubble tea in my hand
  • I had another picture of myself as Baby Grace from the snapchat filter
  • There was also another photo of me and my brother in the museum of illusions. I was posing in awesome manner (upside down) while he was just standing straight and being boring
  • I also included another group photo of me and my friends failing in an escape room T_T (I WANNA ESCAPE YOOOOO)

I had to choose 3 prompts for Hinge. Prompts are used as conversation starters. The guy/girl may comment on your prompt. However, they cannot have a conversation with you unless you accept/allow them to.

Here were my prompts:

I’m the type of texter who
loves puns. I love English puns, Chinese puns. As long as they are punny, go for it. XD

Together we can…
compose a song together! I loveeee music!!!

The secret to getting to know me is
read my blog. liveandlearn88.com

I like my prompts because I think it makes me more unique and it reflects me well. I didn’t want to be the typical “I like to eat, travel, and sleep” LOL (no offense if that’s what you like).

If you are confused and needs some help using Hinge, visit https://hingeapp.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/categories/360001659533-Getting-Started for more information

 

MY EXPERIENCE

I’m told that guys on Hinge get to swipe approximately 5 people a day if they are a regular user. (I’m not sure if it’s the same for females).

Personally, I didn’t actually click like on anyone’s profiles. I only commented on one profile because I wanted to know what a dank meme was.

I didn’t actually have to initiate anything with anyone because I was getting likes every few minutes on the first day I created my profile. At first, I was open to all. But I had to make it super difficult because there were too many people and some guys were so old, they could be my dad. For instance, one guy was 64… uh…

As a result, I made it much harder for people to discover me since I put a deal breaker on age, no one with kids already, no drugs, and etc.

Hinge made me a preferred member for a month because they wanted to encourage me to use the app more. When you’re a preferred member, you can see everyone that has liked/commented on your profile. Otherwise, you would have to accept or reject one at a time before you can view the next person’s profile.

As a preferred member, you also get preferred preferences and you can customize it even more to fit what you are looking for.

 

LUCK

The reason why I have to filter so hard is because there are just too many people. I cannot talk to everyone. Basically, I accepted those who read my blog LOL (I can tell based on their comments) and if they are into music.

There are definitely a lot of guys with potential, but I have limited time and energy. I can only focus on so many before I lose track of the names and get them all mixed up. I cannot talk to a hundred people. I know that a hundred likes doesn’t necessarily mean a hundred options. However, if I accepted and they messaged me, I didn’t want to ignore them. Hence, I just let them pile up.

So as you can tell, online dating has a lot to do with luck too.

  1. Both you and your match have to be using it during the same time span.
  2. The age range is also a huge factor. I had just turned 31 around two weeks after I created my profile. One of my matches told me his cut off was 30. So technically, if I had started using the app in the middle of Sept, I wouldn’t even have popped up in his feed and we wouldn’t have spoken.
  3. Aside from one other person, I only spoke with those who have messaged me within the first 2-3 days that I was using the app. So it’s almost like first come first serve (Sorry if that sounds bad).

  Continue reading “My dating experience on Hinge”

Heartache

I’ve neglected my personal posts for over a month now. I’m so sorry… I know, I’m always apologizing. However, I honestly don’t have motivation to post. I have thoughts but I don’t want to share them.

Today, though, I want to share a song that has moved my heart. I have translated some of the lyrics. It’s not exactly 100%, but it’s close enough. Please listen to the song as you read it. The song starts around 0:22

By the way, the thoughts were inspired by the song. This post is not a depressing call for help or anything. lol

At night, is there someone to help you light a lamp?
When you’re dreaming, is there someone to help you unfold your hands?
When you’re upset, is there someone to help you wipe away the tears?
When you’re down, is there someone to wrap you in an embrace? 

Could it be
You truly don’t know
How much you mean to me?

Could it be
You honestly don’t feel it? 

There’s nothing more my love needs to say
Until the end of time

Honestly, this is one of the most touching performances I have ever seen/heard. From his voice, I could hear heartache, sadness, vulnerability, and defeat. It makes me want to tear up.

I think in general, we all want to find a partner who will be there for us in times of need. Knowing you are loved is comforting. Seldom would we choose a path of loneliness.  Continue reading “Heartache”

Guess who is featured in an interesting podcast!? (me)

To my dear readers,

Last week, my ex neighbour Jack picked me up and we recorded an interesting podcast with his friend and co-host Gavin in his “studio” (his room). Haha.

I haven’t seen Jack since 2002. He was 9 at the time.

It’s crazy how time flew by and we recently reconnected through facebook because he was trying to promote his podcast. Ahahahahaha.

Anyhow, the podcast is super interesting so you should listen.

Here’s briefly what we talked about: Continue reading “Guess who is featured in an interesting podcast!? (me)”

My attention span and Pokémon Go

I haven’t written a personal post in a very long time. But I haven’t forgotten you guys. I just don’t want to write for the sake of writing.

These days, I feel like I have the attention span of a potato. When I was young (before I had the internet), I would breeze through a book in one sitting. 300 pages? No big deal.

Nowadays, reading 50 pages is a struggle. I’m constantly tempted to do something else.

Haha, honestly, I blame the internet and my lack of self control. With so many social media applications nowadays, my generation is constantly checking up on what others are doing or posting something to show others what they are doing.

Deep down, I know the smart thing is to focus on my personal growth rather than see which pokemons my friends have caught. But I guess I enjoy being amused and not using my brain (I know, I sound terrible).
Continue reading “My attention span and Pokémon Go”

Controlling your mind

controlling your mind

Sorry I’ve been somewhat neglecting my personal blog posts. Recently, I have been out of ideas. For the longest time, I’ve been debating on what to write. I even googled “Interesting topics to write about”! Haha.

Anyway, today, I want to talk about controlling your mind.

Has it ever occurred to you that most of the pain we suffer from are caused by our thoughts?? Most of the time, when we are dealing with negative emotions, it is because we allow those emotions to grow.

Some may say, “I couldn’t help it.” True, to some extent, we do not have control over our thoughts. But in my opinion, we could change our state of mind if we allow it. 

When I was little, I always saw myself as a victim. I always blamed everything on everyone else but myself. I felt like I didn’t have any control and life was just super unfair.

Continue reading “Controlling your mind”

Some of my favourite posts

Death

I’ve decided to create a post where you can read some of my favourite posts without having to scroll around my blog. Some of these posts are quite old (from 2 years ago). However, I still wanted to share. Hope you enjoy!

A 3 part series
Time and Financial Freedom (part 1)
The Secret (part 2)
The Three Ways (part 3)

Stories
The story of two families
The Tiny Frog
The Glass
The World In Green

Self improvement 
Building Confidence
Questionnaire for yourself
Social Anxiety
Communication
Fear
From the bottom to the top

Quote challenge
Quote Challenge 1/3
Quote Challenge 2/3
Quote Challenge 3/3

Society 
Reality vs the Internet
Attention
Appearance
A society with messed up values
Why I hate the Education System

Based on books
Wise Words
The Little Prince
Born To Win
Think and Grow Rich
The Virtual World

Learning
Things to consider when investing
How to read Chinese
Conversation Tips

Good deeds
Helping the Homeless: Happy Feet
An act of kindness

Asian
How most Asian parents think
Shaming

Relationships
Relationship Goals
Can Men and Women be purely friends?
Should guys pay for the first date?
Should you be allowed to hang out alone with the opposite sex if you’re in a relationship?
The Perfect Man
How to escape the Friendzone

From a different angle
Just a reminder
Perspective
Don’t judge a person by the cover
What is Success?

I just really like this movie
Zootopia

There are too many posts and I didn’t include them all. If you want to read more, please visit: liveandlearn88.com . Thanks, everyone! ❤

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5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship

toxic relationship

This week’s relationship topic is brought to you by my Moo Moo! You can visit her blog here.

5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship

1. You are always experiencing negative emotions. Ex. You feel like you’re never good enough. Or perhaps, he/she doesn’t care about you or your feelings, constantly comparing you with other people, disrespecting you, etc.

2. You are constantly giving, and not receiving anything back. A healthy relationship requires both parties to put in effort, thought and time. If only one of you is doing all the work, then you need to seriously have a talk about it.

3. He/she tries to control you (who you see, who you talk to, your choices, your money, and etc). Obviously in a relationship, compromises are needed. However, if you need his/her permission to do things, then that’s not right.

Continue reading “5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship”

From the bottom to the top

started from the bottom.jpg

This post is a collaboration post I did with my friend, Alex. Instead of always talking about my own opinions from my own perspectives, I thought it would be interesting asking someone else. In the past, Alex and I would have very meaningful and deep conversations over coffee. Although he currently resides in Thailand, the internet has made it easy for us to stay in touch. I really like his answers, and hope you will as well.

Me: Alex, I want to write a post in regards to confidence because I think it is so crucial if you want to succeed in anything. Tell me, what does confidence mean to you? 

Alex: I think confidence is being fully comfortable with yourself as a person. Being comfortable with all of your flaws and insecurities and not being afraid to show them. Caring less about what others think and doing what makes you happy instead.

Me: How would you define it?

Alex: Being 100% your true self and not being afraid to express it wherever you are.

Me: I like that!! Everyone’s definition is probably different. To me, confidence is knowing that you’re capable of succeeding if you put in the work. Was there a person who has contributed to your confidence? If so, what did that person do or say to build up your self-esteem and feeling of self-worth?

Alex: One of my good friends living in Korea. He has this never-ending drive to improve himself and I just really admired his determination. Whether it was mastering Korean, starting a business or getting a better job, he made it happen. No matter what. Seeing his drive for being the best motivated me to be the best I could be as well.

Continue reading “From the bottom to the top”

Should you be allowed to hang out alone with the opposite sex if you’re in a relationship?

talking with the opposite gender

This is another controversial topic. I’m going to share both side of the arguments before stating what I think.

Why you shouldn’t be allowed 

+ There are no reasons why you need to see your friend alone. You shouldn’t be sharing things with him/her that you wouldn’t be sharing with me.

+ Men and women cannot be friends. Even if you do not like him/her, he/she probably likes you.

+ It’s not that I don’t trust you. I don’t trust him/her.

+ I should be more important than your friend. Is our relationship more important, or your friendship?

Why you should be allowed

+ She/he was in your life before your partner came in. You used to hang out alone all the time.

+ You guys are honestly just friends.

+ Your partner should trust you enough to be ok with you hanging out with the opposite sex.

+ You shouldn’t have to bring your partner everywhere.

——-

I can see the points from both side of the argument. Personally, I would be extremely upset if I had to choose between my guy friends or my partner. I have many guy friends, and there are some I’ve been friends with since elementary school. In my opinion, it is unfair if I cannot even have a coffee with a friend I have known for 20 years without my partner being there. I would feel offended because I would feel like he doesn’t trust me.

However, I do believe that the frequency of the meetups play a very strong factor. Obviously, if I were to see my guy friends alone on a regular basis, it is inappropriate. But if I were to only meet up once or twice a year,  I think it should be acceptable. (Note: This is my personal opinion)

I do have friends who do not allow their partners to see anyone of the opposite sex though. In their opinion, they want to ensure that nothing can ever occur between their partner and their partner’s friends. Therefore, by not ever allowing them to be alone together, they can minimize any possibilities.

Some people are insecure based on past experiences. If they have been cheated on in the past, they probably won’t let you see friends of the opposite sex (alone or in groups). If they do not believe men and women could be friends, they will most likely be against it as well.

Basically, everyone’s comfort level is different. If you have a lot of friends of the opposite sex, you should tell your partner initially. Sometimes, you’re going to have to compromise. Communicate and come up with something that both of you can agree on.

What are your thoughts??

Note: I didn’t create the banner. I found it on google.

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