Attention

Attention

Attention can make us feel acknowledged, appreciated, and valued. As a result, a lot of people seek attention.

In general, if one wants attention, he/she will do something to try to get others to notice them. This can include: posting a lot of pictures, messaging a lot, doing something out of the ordinary, being very loud, making controversial statements, and so on.

Some try extremely hard to get the attention of others. This may be because they feel that it validates their existence. For example, for devoted fans, it means the world to them if their celebrity crushes notice them. Thus, it is very common for extreme fans to continuously bombard their celebrities with tweets and comments. To them, if the celebrity ever responds or retweets to even one message, they feel like it’s all worth it.

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How most Asian parents think

A plus

Instead of blogging about motivational things this week, I want to share something that I find quite interesting and true for most traditional Asian families.

Note: This post is based on my experiences, as well as many others. It is not to say all Asian parents are like this.

Punishment
Asian parents believe it is totally acceptable to beat their children. They believe that punishment will deter an undesirable behaviour from happening again. Perhaps the child will be too afraid to get hit, so he/she will be too frightened to misbehave.

Once, my friends and I were randomly discussing over getting beaten as a child, and we went through a circle telling each other what we were hit with. Surprisingly, all of our parents used different things! The list consisted of: hand, a stick, a feather duster, a broom, newspaper, a ruler, a coat hanger, a rope, a hockey stick, and even a baseball bat. When we heard “baseball bat”, all of us were slightly amused and surprised at the same time. We all went, “Woaahhhh.” After all, baseball bats are so heavy/hard! That’s brutal!! But we had a great laugh. We all turned out fine, I think.

The Western society might find this shocking and unacceptable, but it is very common if you grew up with traditional Asian parents.

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Building Confidence

Confidence

Confidence is an amazing feeling. It makes you feel like you can do anything.

It is power.

It is belief.

It is also posture and energy.

When someone is confident, you can sense it right away. It’s as if there is an invisible shield surrounding him/her. Confident people are usually very good presenters and quite popular. No wonder then, most people want to be confident. But the question is, how?

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Random relationship thoughts

Relationship

A couple days ago, my friend said this to me, “A woman’s loyalty is tested when her man has nothing. A man’s loyalty is tested when he has everything.” Although it’s simply two sentences, I feel like it holds so much truth.

Would a woman really stay with a man who has nothing? And if a man has everything, would he really be satisfied staying with one woman?

If you were to get onto a bus, and there were only one seat. Assuming you wanted to sit, you would be very grateful to see a seat, and you would happily sit on it. On the other hand, if you were on an empty bus, you would probably not sit on the very first seat you see. Instead, you would try to find a seat that has the best view (along with it being the cleanest and most spacious). I think it’s fair to say that when we have options, we tend to be pickier.

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Questionnaire for yourself

Questions

For this post to be effective, please take out a piece of paper and a pen to complete the following exercise.

1. Make a list of 10 things you love to do. Then make a list of 10 things you do each day. Compare the list. 

Are you doing what you love? If not, why not?

If there is something you love doing, make time for it. Don’t give yourself excuses or postpone it for another time. For example, if you love travelling, set aside a budget and time! Don’t wait until you have more money. Don’t wait until you have more time. Sometimes, days will turn into weeks, weeks into years, and eventually you won’t have any time left.

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The World In Green

green

There once was a very wealthy merchant who had everything he wanted. He hustled day and night to achieve his financial freedom, and was quite satisfied with his result. But one day, he developed a splitting headache that wouldn’t go away. He travelled far and wide to find a cure, but none of the healers were able to get rid of his pain. The merchant was in despair.

“Oh, what good are my possessions if I must constantly suffer from this terrible headache?” he cried. The merchant decided to reward a pot of gold to the person who could cure him.

The reward attracted people from all over town. Each day, hundreds line up in hopes to cure the merchant. Sadly, all of them leave in disappointment. Just as it seemed like all hope was lost, a man named Alexander came up to the merchant and said, “Sir, your headache will disappear if you look at green coloured things.”

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Perspective

Perspective

Two different men grew up in broken families. They were both molested at a young age and suffered from bullying and poverty. One man became very successful and became a millionaire when he was older. But instead of spending lavishly on himself, he donated most of his money to help others in need. People all over the world asked him, “Sir, could you tell us your secret to success? How did you become the way you are?”

The successful man replied, “With a past like my own, what else could I have done?”

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The Glass

Glass

Story time!! This story has been modified into my own version.

Melissa is feeling very unhappy, unmotivated, and lost. She knows she is alive, but she doesn’t feel like she’s living at all. Everyday, she does the same things over and over again. What makes it worse is that society expects her to be at a certain stage at a certain age. For example, she was expected to go to school until she was an adult. Now, she is expected to find a good stable job, purchase a home, and eventually get marry and start a family. It’s as if there is only one way to live and if she wanted to do things out of the ordinary, she only receives criticisms and disapproval.

But Melissa knows she wants more in life. She decides to attend a motivational speaking presentation in hopes of developing more clarity, passion, and purpose.

As Melissa enters the auditorium, she notices the speaker setting up the stage. She sees a glass of water that is half filled. Oh my goodness, Melissa thinks, he’s going to ask the audience whether the glass is half full or half empty. How typical. What a waste of time. Why do I even bother with these motivational presentations? They’re full of shit. Forget it, I’m leaving.

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Wise Words

Wisdom

The material I am using for this post is based from a book called, “How to live without fear and worry” by K.Sri Dhammananda.

1. Modern life is a struggle -a struggle to gain monetary rewards, comfort and luxury. Instead of bring happiness, this lifestyle brings anxieties and stress. 

When I read this line, I was slightly stunned. I’ve always known that life is not easy, but I have never really thought about why life is so hard. Is it hard because we are always trying to attain something we don’t have? Why is it so difficult to be happy with our lives? Some may blame society and the media for causing us to be so ungrateful, but stop for a second, and ask yourself, “What are you chasing after?” 

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Reality vs the Internet

Reality vs real life

Today, I had a sudden urge to blog about a topic that has been on my mind for quite some time. I want to write about people who compare their lives with the lives of the people they have on facebook/instagram/twitter/other social media. It’s actually quite common, I think.

The reason this issue bothers me is because people actually take it too seriously. I know for a fact, some people are envious or jealous of certain lifestyles people portray online. Sometimes, it seems like everyone has a better life than us. There are people who look so hot, who look so rich, who look so successful, who look so happy, and etc. However, you must understand that people only show you what they want you to see. For example, someone can post up a picture of a house they newly bought. You, the viewer, is probably like, “Wow. Blah blah blah bought a house! He/she must be doing so well”. (or something along those lines). BUT GUESS WHAT? It’s not always true!! You don’t see them struggling to pay the bills. For all you know, they probably can’t even afford it. A lot of the times, people buy things they cannot afford.

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